All you have is awareness. Everything else is suppositional, conceptual, thought-created overlays. Awareness of the movement of thought, of energy, inside and outside yourself. One unitary movement, totally related, acting on itself inside and out: stimuli, interpretation, response over and over again in omnidirectional movement.
Even our thoughts of God, or what you will, are only thought-created concepts and interpretations of first person 'experiences'. Those 'experiences' really don't have a name, but thought gives them one for the sake of communication between beings and for the sake of replaying the event in our mind and that 'sharing' of those moments are 'shells' or 'symbols' that point to the actual happening, which is already 'dead': of the past. IF you can 'think of' or 'about' it, then it is already dead. Thought cannot grab reality. If thought can conceptualize it, then it is gone. There is beauty in that. There is nothing there to be sad for. Thought wants to be sad about it, but that is pointless because it is beautiful. No man or woman or being can own the ever-living, ever-moving, omnipresent, omnidirectional present moment. What thought creates is a reality, of sorts, but it is a dead reality.
The only living moment is that which cannot be captured. If it can be captured by thought, then it is of the past, which is all ashes of a fire which never rests and has already travelled through: the ever present moment. No one can lay claim to or own this and it is open to all of consciousness who would 'look'. It is the body that dies; awareness...never.