Forgiving Yourself When Others Don't

Our forgiveness of ourselves cannot be predicated on whether others forgive us for our mistakes. That would be missing the point entirely. Growing and evolving through our own process must be an independent yet related flow to the mirror that others provide. What they provide and what we see in that mirror IS feedback, but it has to be taken in, mixed with compassion and love and then redirected through our own centers of self-reflection and learning. No matter what we are, who we are....even with all of our (--I use this word loosely) 'idiosyncrasies' we are still with ourselves and it is our job to take care of who we are.

"What others think of us is none of our business" is a quote from someone somewhere that I have heard over and over through the years. While this is true, others still provide a barometer of sorts of how we are. I think the sweet spot is somewhere in the mix between the experiential feedback that we receive from our experiences and how much dissonance we encounter when we reflect on the experiences later. I believe the truth is in the 'afterimage' that we encounter when alone and have had time to reflect in a prayerful, balanced light within the heart.

Parental Forgiveness Just Because (That Will Be YOU Eventually)

We all age and as we age we tend to care less about semantics and political correctness and more about just conversing--just saying exactly is what is on our minds. This is all fine and dandy except when we are talking to our kids. Even though our parents age and we speak to them as adults do and they speak to us as adults as well, we are still their 'kids'.

Sometimes they forget to have the sensitivity that they should. Sometimes they forget that we still have feelings that can be damaged by what they say. I am here to say that we should offer them grace and forgive them without them even needing to know that we are doing that or that IF we took them seriously we would be hurt by what they are saying at that moment. Sometimes it is not worth the energy of trying to bring it to their attention and sometimes it is. We have to decide that on a case by case basis. The explanation and conversation to them can be lost and the significance of it lost just in the time and words that it takes to lay it out for them. Just to let it go is in many cases the best option. If you can see it with humor and with grace, then you have done yourself a service and by extension them as well.

Although that can be hard to see, that may eventually be us one day. Wouldn't it be nice if at that time our child afforded us the same grace? I think it would; at least it would be for me.  

At The Heart Is The Heart

At The Heart Is The Heart whether above, behind, in front or below. It is there, only one.


There are no games here, only simplicity, not as in a lack of fullness, but rather in the one song:  

Oneverse.


Mind plays all it wants, singing this, saying that and then doubling back and biting itself without realizing that it was the cause of it's own misery until after the fact. After the party guests have left and the pain has subsided, then it sees it's own tracks in the mudd. There is silence and a small window of realization. "Ah, that's the answer", it says to itself. I see now....


The night parts, the mists rise from the ground as the soft, powdery, gray-rose light coats the underbelly of the morning sky.....


and with those mists lifts the learning of humankind rising up to the Sun Chakra of God....

Another Day has begun. Breathe in, breathe out, Earth turning on its Axis......all the while


At The Heart Is The Heart whether above, behind, in front or below. It is there, Only One.


There are no games here, only simplicity.

OneVerse.

Universe.

A Thought on Passing.....


As we get older the loved ones in our lives will move on to the next phase of existence. The older we get, the more this will take place. We call it death. Is that what it is? As I see it, it is the 'end of the known'. We don't know for ourselves what is on the other side of this mortal veil and for all of this we are afraid, but should we be? We have our beliefs and yet, we do not know what lies beyond. This is fact.

Why not celebrate the passing of our loved ones as well as our own? We get lost in what could have been: Why weren't we closer? Why didn't we make ammends? Why didn't we try and visit more often? Why weren't we kinder to them? Why weren't I a better son/daughter/cousin/grandchild/friend,etc.? There is no end to all of this mental machinery.

Death is the great equalizer. We all face it...period. Death is the end of The Known and the Beginning of Something Unknown. We must cherish our loved ones and hold them in our love and light and let them go on to the next phase of Existence.

I think it is good to ponder our mortality. It makes us take stock of what we have and to cherish that. To be alive is a blessing. We should celebrate life just as we celebrate their lives.

We should love ourselves and love each other in all of our imperfections. Love is the Great Healer.




An 'Old Man' Moment: Finding Hair in Uneccessary Places

Ok, so I've joked about this scenario over and over again throughout time, but the canary has finally come back around to collect the airtime tax. Haha. 

Yeah, so anyway, I'm looking at myself in the mirror today and I'll be doggone if I didn't see three hairs coming off the sides of my ears: two off of one ear and one off of another. Yes, 3!! They were about two inches long a piece and, of course, I pulled them out the instant I saw them. Yes, they smarted a bit. They were definitely in there and no, they didn't plan on leaving anytime soon but leaving they were. As far as I know I don't feelers to keep from bumping into walls. After all, I just got glasses a few weeks ago and the prescription is not all that strong besides. 

Ok, I've admitted it. Hair Happens.